One Act Play Excerpts
Justice
Comedy. 2 actors.
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JUDGE QUINCY: Wonderful, let’s get a few things straight. Our 78-year-old bailiff is napping in his car. I gave the Deputy the day off. It is Sunday and his 40th wedding anniversary to boot. But there are two people that never take a day off. Smith and Wesson, just so we are clear.
The Open Door
Comedy...for the most part. 2 actors.
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EDNA: I mean big. 6’7 and wide. I don’t know what he liked more. A case a beer or constantly reminding my mother he could knock her down with an open hand. “Never took a fist to her,” he liked to tell the police. I don’t like big men Louie. I don’t like men who can stand over me. I don’t like men who can surround me. I don’t like men who can hold me to the floor by my neck without the slightest struggle and do whatever they please. I like a man no taller than my nose. I prefer that, then we’re kind of even. And I don’t need a therapist to fix this. I’m not broken. To me a big man is an ugly man. That’s the way it is, and that is the way it will always be.
Spontaneous Combustion
Comedy. 2 actors.
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RUTH: Did you just come up with it out of the blue or is it a routine you have for occasions like these? Ah, what do I care. But tell me? What was it? You just didn't like the way I look? What? Is it because I ain't dainty? You like those dainty, waify women?
The Good Father
Drama. 2 actors.
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HEATHER: What does that mean? Why do you keep saying that to me? What are you doing? You came here to tell me you’re going to kill me? When? Tomorrow? Next week? And I should do what? Make my peace? With what? I don’t have peace, ever. I can’t take this anymore! Do your job! Kill me! Do your job!
The Weight
Comedy. 2 actors.
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JAKE: You know what it looks like to me Maxi? It looks like you just want to let me go a little bit at a time so it’s easy for you. And you have no regard for me, and what if feels like to watch everything that means something drift away until there’s nothing. And then when I finally get a clean t-shirt on you pull the rug out.